Monday, January 21, 2019

Toddler Led Co-Sleeping

Toddler led co-sleeping....

That's what I'm going to call it because that's the only way I can explain this weird regression that has Norah sleeping on our bedroom floor for the last two weeks.

One night she just brought her own blanket in and when I woke up, there she was, sandwiched between our bed and Linus' bed. After a couple nights of trying to take her back into her room only to have her back on the floor an hour later, I decided that right now my sleep is more important than staying up all night fighting the good fight.

This all happened around the time we started potty training (which she totally is now! Hallelujah!) so I figured maybe such a big event/change in her daily routine made her regress in another part of her life. But now she is expressing fears and worries and actually remembering dreams/nightmares that she is having particularly one involving "the green guy" which we later found out was Yoda from Star Wars. This dream was about a month ago and she still talks about Yoda daily but will reassure you that it was "all in her head and just a dream".

Today I asked her why she is afraid to sleep in her bed and she expressed her concern about strangers coming in her house. This is from a girl who, up until now, doesn't know a stranger because everyone is her friend. 

We've been trying to reassure her that we are so safe in our little gated neighborhood and that we lock our doors and Linus would never let anyone in our house and that she is always safe when Mommy and Daddy are around, but the truth is, I have the same fears sometimes.

This has been a great lesson in not projecting my own fears and worries onto her because it just breaks my heart that this innocent little cuddle bug is now facing real world fears and knows what it is to worry about something. 

This parenting thing is a wild ride. Just when you conquer one thing, another challenge pops up to throw you for a loop!

Thursday, January 10, 2019

Mom Guilt

Mom guilt...I've got it.

This pregnancy hasn't been easy on me. The first trimester was plagued with morning sickness that hit me hard in the afternoon and I would spend most evenings crying because I felt it would never go away. Then that went away (with the help of life saving pills) and I was in the second trimester which I was hoping would be this magical time of feeling great with more energy and an awesome glow. 
Unfortunately I skipped over that part and I've been in constant round ligament pain with a clicking pubic bone ever sense. Walking, sitting, laying, rolling's all excruciating. I'm nearing the end of this trimester and I found out I have gestational diabetes again and I'm just over here like, wah, wah, poor me.

But even more disheartening than my own issues is feeling like I'm a crappy mom because Norah has so much energy and I do not. She goes from one activity to the next at lightening speed and I just can't keep up. We do a lot of crafts where I can sit and watch but she needs more. There are days where we can run all of our errands, go to the park, and go for a walk/bike ride and days like today where I'm counting down till bedtime.

I know once the baby is here I'll physically be able to do more but it will be a different type of guilt while I have an even tinier human who depends on me for every need.

So, hey moms! What are your tips and tricks for being the best mom you can be while pregnant/caring for a newborn.

I want to make this transition as smooth as possible for all of us and keep my wild girl stimulated and happy all day.

P.S. Shout out to Tim who, when he isn't working, kills it at being a Dad <3 p="">

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

The Time Kids at the Park Made Me Cry.

Today I just couldn't bear to play another minute of princesses in the dollhouse so I suggested we go practice riding her bike. As soon as we rounded the corner and saw the park was full of people, she squealed with delight, "My friends! I'm so excited" and she quickly parked her bike next to all of the abandoned scooters and skateboards and made her way over to the first group of kids.

"Hi! I got a bike from Santa, it's over there!"

So she just joined in on their game of chase as happy as could be and they stopped and just stood there staring at her.

I called her over to play in another area where she found a boy a little younger than her and she introduced herself .


So she started telling his mom about how her birthday is coming up and she will be 3 and at her party she will have so many fun things to do.


Then the kids decided it was time to go home and they all ran to their bikes/scooters and decided whose house they were going to play at. Norah quickly ran to her bike and said "Me too! Me too!" and a girl about 7 gives her the dirtiest look and says, "Not you! Mom! Tell her not to come to my house!" and the mom. did. nothing. 

All I could do was tell her in front of them, "I'm so sorry. Sometimes people are rude and don't use their manners" and they just stared at me. I won't be surprised if I end up on the neighborhood Facebook page ::insert eye roll::

As they rode away Norah ran after them asking if she could come play too and when they were out of sight she sat on the curb and put her face in her hands.

My heart broke into a million pieces and I don't know if it's a mom thing or all of these pregnancy hormones surging through my body but I just started sobbing right there in the middle of the park. 
I quickly suggested we go home and paint (something I really didn't want to do but knew she would be excited about).

I cried all the way home and when she asked what was wrong I told her I had hurt my finger and she stopped to comfort me which made me cry more.

This tiny little being drives me crazy all day long and has more attitude than I thought possible but she is so kind and loving and just wants to be friends with everyone. All she wanted was to feel included and she was shut down and at that point I got a glimpse of how kids and parents alike can be rude and she is starting to get life lessons that I'm just not ready for.